“You have no scores yet.” I keep clicking refresh with the vain hope that my scores will magically appear if only I click the button enough times. Today is my judgement day. I am getting my MCAT scores, which will unfortunately determine way too much of my future as a medical school applicant. I’ve worked for three years, taking night classes as a non-traditional medical school applicant so that I could get to this point. How cruel to think one exam could completely shut some doors for me. Sigh.
Tick, tock. Time is moving like molasses. Part of me doesn’t want to know. As long as I don’t know, I can keep hope alive that I stand a chance at any University. I clicked again. Nothing.
Just like the actual exam, the last three years are a blur. A conglomeration of note cards, organic reactions, heart and kidney diagrams, tests, weekends lost to studying and some of the happiest times of my long career as a student. I had no idea I would actually LOVE science. Not just enjoy. But LOVE. I mean the type of LOVE where you think about it when it’s not around, miss it when it leaves you for a few days. I would actually get sad when my courses ended and I again had free time. I guess you could say, that’s when I knew I was on the right track.
As a journalism undergraduate student I had no idea I would find the world of viruses, carbon compounds and physiology so enthralling. In undergrad I spent my days at the television studio. As fun as it was to work in-front of and behind the camera I knew it wasn’t what I wanted.
Since I was a little kid, playing doctor with stuffed animals, dissecting insects I captured, or running make-shift experiments with my poison ivy “vaccine,” I knew I loved medicine. In middle school, I went to a used bookstore and purchased medical school textbooks. I figured if I could get through them by the time high school was over, I’d be ahead of the game. Somewhere along the way I discovered writing came easily. It was fun and and when you are 17 years old and faced with doing something easy or tackling calculus and organic chemistry- journalism seemed like a no brainer.
Well, long story short, I didn’t come full circle with my desire to become a physician until after I finished my Master’s in Public Policy and International Development. At 23, I hadn’t taken more than a single introductory chemistry class. Which turned out to be totally OK because in the end I LOVED science and did extremely well in my classes.
I just hope my MCAT shows this.
“No scores yet…”